Middle Child

 I was the middle child in our family and a chance look at the Microsoft Edge newsreel this morning had a discussion on middle children. I was really in the middle, three younger and three older. It was an interesting place to be in a family. You got to watch what happened to the older ones during the course of time with regard to what they could and could not do thus warning you of transgressable offences. The younger ones sort of looked up to you because you were older but there was also the need to babysit them because the olders had busier lives than you did. But I do think if there is any place to be in the family it is the middle child. You grow up independent of people; there are already so many in your family that acquiring friends from outside is just something that I didn't do. There were plenty of people around me all the time when I lived at home. Then I got married at 20 and just never really ever reached out to make friends because you still seem to have a lot of people around you even if you are not living in the same city. 

I find also that I tend to be more readily put off by other people. When my oldest had gone off to school and I was still home trying to decide whether to return to work I went off shopping with this individual. I was assured that we would be back before the school bus but that didn't happen. It affected me the rest of my child rearing days. I never went anywhere with anyone again unless I was driving. I think that is a middle child characteristic - less trusting of outsiders. Pretty well everyone is an outsider in my world except for my close family. People did try to become closer but I just never trusted anyone again although did babysit their child/children on occasion in my own home when they asked. I can still be the good neighbour that Christ asked us to be; I just do not trust anyone to do what they say that they will do until they actually do. But I still do not make friends because of that just acquaintances.

Pincombe-Pinkham newsletter completed and will be posted Wednesday

 I completed the Pincombe-Pinkham newsletter and will upload  to the website. Hard to believe that the next issue starts Volume 7. For the most part comments are positive on my Pincombe-Pinkham research although I did have one negative comment a couple of years ago (I only just read it lately as I had forgotten that I had moderated my comments). It was dealing with the Pincombe Coat of Arms which was awarded to John Pincombe of South Molton but his line daughtered out and in fact no descendants that I know of are left of that line but I can be corrected if wrong. It was a sort of anti-American rant in that the comment mentioned that Americans think that this family had a coat of arms and it was just their invention. Well in reality they did have a coat of arms although no one uses it officially although I have put a copy into the newsletter for prosperity. I do live a long way away from Devon, England though so there may be descendants of that South Molton line but none known to me! The South Molton line was the wealthier of the Pincombe families that descended from that first Pencombe who came with Lord de la Zouch to North Molton in 1485. Was he from Pencombe Herefordshire? Others close to that area might be able to determine that but I will leave it to people who live much closer to the record office. I have no plans to travel to the British Isles. By nature I am a homebody but can be inspired to travel great distances like my pilgrimage to Rome in 2001. Accompanying my husband has been my principal traveling the 54.5 years of our marriage. We traveled a lot in my opinion and would have done even more but I didn't want to do Europe more than once every two years. Edward would have liked to have just gone for a weekend to capital cities and the like and it might have been interesting but if I travel I like to see a lot of the area and not just an opera and dinner out. I like Opera but not enough to go thousands of miles just to get all dressed up for one night out. 

Today is cleaning day for the top floor plus I did grocery shopping. The robot has done its job and I have dusted all the rooms (including the baseboards, my mother was a stickler for doing it up right!) and just have the bathroom to clean and the rug on the stairs to vacuum. This house is much too big but we are doing something different to what was originally thought. My son in law and grandson will be here in the week for our grandson to go to a special school and I will be with my other daughter. The downsizing was a good idea as now there is lots of room for that to happen and Edward would be pleased that we have kept the house as he never wanted to leave it although did occasionally talk about a retirement home but when the discussion turned to what to do with everything he always changed his mind. He wanted to have everything and the only way was to be here. 

Myself I wanted to sell about six years ago and move to where one of my daughters lives but we could not agree on that idea and so we stayed here and visited them instead. Edward liked being part of everything especially the Ottawa Branch of the Ontario Genealogical Society. He was still a Member at Large enjoying every minute of those meetings. He could not do as much as he had been doing but it felt good to him to still be there. I became somewhat nervous of the driving as I was doing it and the traffic can be heavy on the Queensway but we managed. One day I shall go and see his books in the Archives at City Hall which is utilized by the Ottawa Branch and BIFHSGO jointly. Will I stay a member of Ottawa Branch? Edward was the chief member; I was just along for the ride. The membership at BIFHSGO is different; I have always been the main member and Edward part of our household membership. Not that we went very often and probably will still not go. I notice all the online meetings but can not seem to get myself into that. I am not really a very sociable person; I prefer to just work away at my projects. I did speak in the past but will never do that again. Edward liked my doing that so I did oblige him but the interest on my part was somewhat low. I did used to set up a table for the Guild of one-name Studies when I was the Eastern Canada Representative but that was before Edward's pacemaker. Since then I avoided taking on any responsibility other than my own basic research in order to help him. 

I found a photo album that Edward prepared during the building of Orleans United Church. He loved being part of that and was the Church Treasurer (there was a separate Treasurer for the building) during that time period (for about ten years in total from the time he took it on until he stepped down although it did not take that long to build the Church building!). There are a lot of pictures from the dedication of the land and the first shovel to the dedication of the Church. I have mentioned it to the one individual that I still know from the Church (he was our lawyer helping us to do our wills back in the mid 1990s and I communicated with him shortly after Edward died as I needed to change my will) but haven't given it up yet as my daughters are still looking at it. It was a big part of both of their lives although I had taught them the Anglican Catechism and Church History as children and would say they are more Anglican/Catholic than United Church. Eventually I will give it to the Church though as it is very comprehensive and they might enjoy having it for their archives. Edward would have liked them to have it I am sure. We were there regularly until Edward's brother died and a chance mention in the Church Bulletin that there was a special Old Testament lecture being given at Dominion Chalmers by one of the old Testament Scholars from St Pauls University and he was also the minister at Dominion Chalmers sent us on a new path. Edward found that so meaningful at a difficult time in his life when he had lost his brother and his mother was failing so we started to attend the regular Sunday Services there until that minister retired. The new minister there was more folksy in terms of his music and approach so we moved on to my Church (Christ Church Cathedral (Anglican)) which we had been attending somewhat  (I had started to tithe there in the mid 1990s instead of the local Anglican Church) and went there full time really until Edward's health deteriorated and he required a pacemaker. He loved the music at the Cathedral and it continues to be spectacular. But I digress and must get back to work vacuuming.

Thank you notes completed and mailed

The task of writing the thank you notes was perhaps one of the hardest that I have done lately. Sometimes I still live in that world where I still do not admit to myself that Edward has passed away. Tasks like that certainly bring you front and centre to reality. It is much easier to live in that world where life hasn't changed. I am now into planning a Celebration of Life for Edward at Christmas time but will wait a couple of weeks before continuing with that planning. My mind simply needs time to adjust and accept that my partner of 54.5 years is no longer at my side. Perhaps it is also being 75 years of age when it is harder to make change for sure. 

Deciding on discussion portion of newsletter

 I needed to choose a new person to think about for the Pincombe-Pinkham newsletter discussion section. I will perhaps try this approach for a while to see if I can stimulate any interest for people submitting articles to the newsletter of their interesting Pincombe-Pinkham ancestor. This time I chose my 4x great grandfather John Pincombe who left a will probated in 1795 with two John Pincombes dying at Bishops Nympton in 1794/95. I was never able to separate them because the will was not available. I knew it was likely his will because he had had land which he passed to his sons but he could do that also without a will. A visit to the Society of Genealogists library in 2013 did reveal part of an answer to all of that and I am just now writing that up in the newsletter. 

I have been a bit of an ostrich with one's head in the sand dealing with the Pincombe-Pinkham newsletter. The original study was started by two Pinkham researchers back in the beginnings of the Guild of one name studies. I have simply picked up their research study and carried on but more from the Pincombe perspective as my line was Pincombe from Bishops Nympton/North Molton. Although yDNA has shown that these two families (mine from Bishops Nympton) and Pinkham lines are not related I do not want to break up a study that shows that the Pinkham/Pincombe surname spellings were used interchangeably in Pincombe families in Devon from the 1700s on. Possibly earlier but I have not yet delved deeply into the Pinkham family. 

Sunday again and Church on YouTube at 10:30. I am not sure I will ever attend an in person service again at the Cathedral. It means my driving downtown which I could do but I enjoy being at home and going to Church virtually. I do not miss any of the service because I can not see around people and I can hear the entire sermon easily. It will be nice when the choirs return as I love the music.

Pincombe-Pinkham Newsletter in process

 Today I begin the Pincombe-Pinkham Newsletter for the 1st of September. 

I am also going to work on the paving stones in the laneway to add play sand and hardening sand. We finally picked up the supplies that we need to work on that task although it looks a bit like rain so may have to postpone but will see how it goes.

Emigration to Canada

 Canada is a difficult country to live in. We should not be considered as the country of last resort (I think we generally are) but I think many times people only come when they are desperate and then go back to their home country when life has improved there. That is difficult for us to manage. We do not need people to emigrate to our cities and make them grow ever larger. We need them to emigrate to the small towns and take up small businesses, farming or trades and become a permanent part of our landscape not just an escape place until better times return or they can go to the United States. 

Cancelling appointments for Edward

I had been trying to cancel an appointment for a cataract assessment for Edward over the past few weeks but kept getting caught in a telephone merry go round that eventually told me to try again later. This morning I did get through and managed to cancel the appointment which is lucky for someone needing an appointment on short notice as it has taken me over a month since I learned of the appointment (quite accidentally) to cancel it. 

It is such a hard thing to say that he is deceased so making the call is difficult in itself and I tend to fumble the words even now. In this computer age one thinks that it is possible to simply mark his chart that he is deceased and appointments will no longer be made for him. But it is a big world and he is not likely the only person who is deceased for whom appointments are made and doing all the paper work does take time for sure. 

I have been busy cleaning this week and today it is the basement and the robot is running around collecting up the dust accumulation of one week. Soon I will wash the floor and then dust and another floor and another week of cleaning is completed on schedule. Tuesday and Thursday we did not do very much in the way of cleaning as that is our plan. It keeps the dust to a minimum doing it floor by floor every other day with the weekend off. 

Cleaned out the desk drawers yesterday and working on the dresser drawers today. I like to keep them sorted so that I can easily find items. Edward used to sort everything keeping it very organized all the time but I tend to do it occasionally as the drawer is less settled. His work room as it was back in the 90s and early 2000s is almost complete with just a couple more pictures to place on the walls. After he completed his masters and came to work at NRC here he felt all thumbs. He had been working hard at his Postdoc and then his MLIS plus doing lab demonstrations in Chemistry without much downtime. He wanted to work at something fine so I suggested needlepoint as I had a number of kits that I had not yet done (wild flowers, song birds and a large woodland scene) so I taught him the stitches that he needed to know and he worked away at that instead of reading or working on his Ham Radio in the evenings after our eldest had gone to sleep. It certainly relaxed him and he did a beautiful job of the needlepoint and they grace the walls of his office as they did years ago. 

You can feel that fall is coming these days. This morning it was cool and I opened up all the windows to let in that fresh air (14 on the air quality index). Closed up now and the sun is shinning gloriously. It will be a beautiful day. We are still taking a couple of quarts of cherry tomatoes off of our tomato bushes and a few green peppers. The lettuce is all finished but the basil is still producing with the parsley having been mostly eaten by the rabbits before we could get to it! Last night we used our air fryer outside to make small potatoes and asparagus marinated in olive oil and some spices. Then poached the salmon on the stove and had a cooked spinach salad for our dinner. Time for hot meals once again. 

 

Canada and Afghanistan

Watching as the Taliban take over Afghanistan after all the blood shed is a loss to the world unless the Taliban can move forward in time and accept a new Afghanistan where men and women are equal and every child has the right to an education. It is only through education that the world is protected whether it be millions of people or only one. Although I would be called a deeply religious person; religion can not be the controlling factor in our lives where the rights of all individuals are concerned. It must be the democratic right of people to choose those who will lead us. Praying to God that he will help the people of Afghanistan to find a way forward that leads them to the life that they want but only they can determine that only they can defend themselves against a ruthless villain within. I do not believe we will ever get involved in such a project again. We need our military here helping to maintain Canada during the many plagues that strike us which is fires at the moment. We need our military to help patrol the high seas protecting the world from pirates. God willing we will never fight a World War again where our military must once again fight an adversary bent on world domination. But we must always be ready for that nonetheless and we will be.

Replying to the condolence cards

 It is three to four months since I received all of the Condolence Cards sending sympathy to myself and our family when Edward died. It has also taken me most of that time to come to terms with his dying although I knew that he was very unwell. I thought that I could be strong enough for both of us but in that regard I failed as I could not halt the forward pace of his disease. 

In the last couple of months of his life Edward had many thoughts on how to manage all of his hobbies and interests and given my tendency to write everything down I did do that and we have followed his ideas to this point in time where there are no longer any desires or requests to fulfill other than actually getting material to some of his relatives which has not yet been accomplished. 

His study room is pretty much as he had it minus the ten bookcases eight of which were enormous reaching from floor to ceiling and everyone of them full of books and other material. The closet with its 36 banker boxes has just 12 boxes now. We combined the parts of his study room that we retained along with the library portion of our bedroom bringing together all of his interests in one room. His urn still sits on the Refectory Table with his plants around it. My daughter has managed to keep his orchids blooming most of the time since he passed away and the blooms have been quite beautiful. His Christmas Cactus have bloomed at Easter which always tended to amaze him and at the moment are gathering up strength for the new blooming. 

I have still not started work on his research boxes but as the Fall comes I will have more time to do that. I am very happy to have thought about using his blog to publish the contents of his research boxes. It will be the easiest way for me to accomplish the idea of passing his material on to other researchers. 

I am just now writing a letter to put into the two different sets of cards that we found in Edward's desk and seemed most fitting to thank people for their kind words and cards. One set has a family tree on the front and the second set is pictures of Loyalist Ontario. A great deal of his spare time and then all of his retirement time was spent either on Genealogy or the United Empire Loyalist Society. I do apologize for the typed reply but will hand write as well if I feel that the reply does not respond to the card received. The words I have chosen:

Thank you so very much for your kind words of condolence following the death of my husband Edward Kipp. Your card was very much appreciated by both myself and our family.

Edward was the centre of our lives. His many ideas dragged us out of our working tendency to view another interesting astronomical happening through his telescope in the back yard or to tell us about another exciting family discovery as he researched his family tree and to hear about lots of interesting ideas on places to visit and things to do. We miss him very much and appreciate your taking the time to send us your condolences.

Sorting and Grass Cutting

Tuesday was a busy day of sorting and grass cutting. We also took another load to Salvation Army. We are starting to get to the end of loads to Salvation Army. The tools go elsewhere and the snow blower. I want to be able to put the car in the garage this winter so that the laneway can be completely cleared by Worry Free. The house cleaning agency will come every two weeks if that works out and that will be a great help as well. I am getting older that is for sure. Seventy six in less than a month God willing. I do not really feel old yet although did feel that way in the spring. I did wonder if illness would claim me for a while. But good care has brought me to a better state of health from my exhaustion and God's help for sure. 

We are to stay in Afghanistan after the American withdrawal on the 31st of August was the earlier thought but that is now changed as we will leave when the American troops are no longer holding the airport. Canadian troops are wonderful; they are dedicated and hard working providing great care to Canadians and others around the world. It was optimistic to think that we could make a difference in Afghanistan. At least the children of one generation actually got to go to school and even university. Will the Taliban continue with that forward surge or will they just be selfish and claim that the tribal ways of the past are good enough for this modern generation? One hopes that they will do as they said and allow women to be part of their country instead of treating them like slaves. 

Today is cleaning the main floor and I will soon begin.

Wednesday is a beautiful day of the week. It is the middle and what has transpired is in the past and what is to come is in the future. Today is a planned day and nothing changes that. All my days are pretty much planned but Tuesday and Thursday have these free time periods when I just work away at what interests me and of course the weekend has lots of free working time. 

Vaccination and where are we at

 In one week worldwide there is an increase of only 1% receiving one dose and 0.9% fully vaccinated. The pace is too slow for the Delta virus moving at lightning speed. 

Yesterday top floor fully cleaned and this is a day of rest and the main floor on Wednesday. Fortunately we continue to live in our carriage home and did not buy a bigger house so at 75 I can still manage with help from my daughter. Although I do not need such a big footprint and will gradually minimize my footprint over time but at the moment all the exercise is good for me as I begin to move ahead through the grieving process and into the wonderful memory process that we all must achieve in order to continue living. I remember my uncle (he was 89) after his wife died. He tried very hard but on his own (this was during SARS) he simply did not have the strength to keep up his house and his health. He only outlived his wife by a few months. They were married for 61 years. We visited them on our many trips back and forth through Toronto. They enjoyed their time spent with our daughters and our daughters enjoyed meeting them. 

I have scanned all the material that my uncle gave to my husband thinking that he would write his life's story as my mother had told him about the Anniversary Book that Edward produced for my parent's 50th wedding anniversary. I did write his story and it was actually 78 pages using mostly his notes. Missing from that story is all the volunteer work that he did as a young man because I only know bits of it and he did not record all of that. He was also very involved with the Conservative Party even thinking about being a candidate although he decided not to do that after all but remained behind the scenes involved with the party all the time that he lived in London. He attended the Methodist Church later United Church of Canada and was heavily involved in the Church all his life. Can one ever really do tribute to those who have passed away ahead of us. I do wonder about that. We keep them alive with our writings and saving pictures and other items and with the modern tools can create files that can live on into the future. That is perhaps our best tribute to them. I have pictures of him through the years (I produced an image with nearly 30 of them that span infanthood to his wife's funeral). 

I am gradually realizing that I need to do the same for Edward and that will be my focus as winter comes and I have more time to work on that. I have his own words for parts of the story and there are music tapes of his solos sung at Church. He so loved to sing. I have some of his talks that he gave to the different groups. There is a little about his working life which I shall also add to the story. 

Another sunny hot day and I am still enjoying the heat but we also have air conditioning so I am not in it all the time which makes a big difference. I look forward to the cool days of autumn and the long winter when I can get so much more work done.

Finally rain

I decided to do a little watering yesterday and it did rain late last evening. The grass is just a little greener today but fall is coming and the grass will green up again. Looks overcast so maybe rain today but definitely our heat warning will continue. Off to the dentist today for my teeth cleaning. Edward had bought a new electric toothbrush a year or so ago and I did the same a few months later and really like this new one. It has just a small round brush like the dentist uses and it is so much easier just to clean one tooth at a time instead of cramming a big toothbrush into your mouth. 

The week of cleaning begins once again. Yesterday we did a little clearing out of our old sound system which we will likely take to Salvation Army as some one might want parts of it to refresh their systems. I kept maybe 1/5 of the vinyl records as I really only like classical music and there are a number of children's records from when our children were young.  Some time I will buy a new turntable that can link with the computer. 

When I am at my daughter's house I shall play the piano. I had acquired a little of the skill back a few years ago but then stopped playing it as life began to get too busy. I shall try to reacquire some of that skill. My father could play very well as could both my daughters. 

More paperwork to look at today. I must get it all organized for income tax time. Then there are all those emails as well and must get to them and the thank you notes for the condolence cards. It is too easy to live in a cocoon and hard to force oneself out but at 75 do I really need to?

Sunday and beautiful sunshine

Sunday again and this one has come quickly. We have had a busy week still cleaning and the progress seems slower because we are now down to the more finishing details. Pantry all cleaned and reorganized. Edward reorganized the pantry to suit himself when he retired and now it probably suits my daughter which is fine; I was happy with Ed's rearrangement. The large main floor closet is also rearranged and looks great. All of the large canning equipment is finding a new home. I will not can anymore unless it is to make chili sauce. For that I do not need a lot of equipment and I would likely make it at my daughter's house. 

The world around us is so very warm these days. Yesterday we took another load to e-waste and waited for quite a while. Need to find a better way to do that because of the car running all that time. Also a load of metal to Salvation Army and a few nick nacks. We are getting down to more basic items now. There will be fewer trips to Salvation Army. 

The shed is about half empty now and will try to continue downsizing it along with the loft in the garage. There is so much in the loft but will wait for my son in law to empty that out. There are a lot of canning supplies up there and they have a new home to go to and he will organize that. The tools are mostly still here and he will organize that as well. 

My days need to become a little quieter again and that time is coming. I am stronger though than I was in the spring. Nursing Edward and then visiting him in the hospital along with the emotional stress of just watching left me exhausted. I feel stronger these days. Keeping busy in itself was stressful because of the downsizing but now the fall is coming with all that restful time of just working away at projects. 

Too bad about the heat warning; we are lucky to have air conditioning a lot of people still do not. Cooler weather is coming but this has been the hottest summer that I can ever remember although there were times back in the 1950s that I recall as being very warm but not for so long and so intense. 

Off to Church today but breakfast first.

Message on Find My Past

 I actually received a message on Find my Past from an individual unknown to me. I decided to accept the contact. I believe it is likely for Edward's tree however as the surname is Boyd. I do not have that surname as far as I know. 

Another sultry day and there will not be many more likely although warmer weather in September has been happening ever since I was a child. But predictably the fall is coming and the maple tree at the back is starting to show change more prominently now and may not just be because it is so dry. 

Mostly accomplished all the cleaning this week which is good news. Still sorting about to do in my work room which has become the container for everything that doesn't have a spot somewhere else. In the long run I need to decide where to put everything and it is easier just to have it all in my face so to speak. 

Starting to think about the Pincombe-Pinkham Newsletter due on the 1st of September. The third would have been our 55th wedding anniversary. Edward wanted to go to the Galapagos. It probably would have been very interesting but not likely to have happened given the state of COVID-19 worldwide. Watching the documentary on the Galapagos I wonder how well a 78 and 75 year old would have managed such a trip!

Vaccination rates are slowly going up in Canada but may not reach 80% fully vaccinated of those eligible to be vaccinated by the end of August which was what I hoped would happen. But perhaps by the end of September we will be closer to the 90% fully vaccinated of those eligible. That would make a big difference especially for the children back at school. Minimizing the frequency of delta variant would be such a great step forward. I still think we will be wearing masks until next summer. I do not mind. It is much pleasanter to go into stores where wood is being cut with a mask on! 

World wide we are slowly moving up with vaccinations: 32.3% have received at least one dose and 24.3% are fully vaccinated.

2034 emails in my Inbox

I am way behind with my emails and apologies to anyone who is expecting one. Another week when I am up to date on my paper mail I will start on those emails. Thank you for your patience. Occasionally I have responded but in a rather brief way. 

Sun again, high temperatures promised, hopefully rain

 Today another cleaning day and it is the basement. I am not yet in the state that I hope to be in by the end of the month although the main floor is fairly settled. Yesterday we cleaned out the pantry having done the large main floor closet the day before as part of the cleaning of that level. There are just the cupboards to work at but that will be done in December. I am steadily downsizing finding new homes for some of the dishes and packing Edward's family dishes into boxes for his niece to have. They should go with someone who knows the family much better than I do. 

On the top floor most of the rooms are as I would want them except for my work room which has become a bit of a catch-all for items not yet located anywhere else. I will put some time into clearing all of that away this weekend. The closets in two of the four bedrooms are organized. So we have come a long way with this floor as well. 

The basement has had a lot of items given away but there is still a lot there in terms of tools which my son in law will eventually decide upon. He will either keep them or give them to family members. I do not have any need for tools other than a few implements. Eventually that area will be a lot clearer but five of the seven tables are now gone (at least the last one is going in the garbage today as it was too old to be of use to anyone). It is ready for a cleaner to come though now. The cluttering has been minimized but not entirely gone yet. 

Looking back we have done so much in the period of COVID-19 shutdown but there is still quite a bit to do. It is unlikely that we will have another shutdown. I am not sure we will need more than sporadic closures when there are outbreaks. If everyone would get vaccinated those outbreaks would be minimal; more like a seasonal flu outbreak. I do not really understand the reluctance to get vaccinated. For some people there may be a need to be cautious but in general the reaction to the vaccine has been good. We have learned a lot giving the vaccine and I am sure the lessons learned will help those who potentially could suffer from reaction. 

My mental state is slowly improving; acceptance is starting to come to me. I find I look forward in time more than backwards these days. Memories that flood my mind tend to be of our fun times together - Edward and I. Our traveling proved to be something we both enjoyed and when he got used to being a world traveler he enjoyed it more than I did. I tend to be more of a homebody. Once I had seen the delights of the British Isles and Europe I was ready to not travel so much but did continue to do so. Edward's roots were more Europe than British Isles and traveling gave him a chance to see where all of his ancestors had lived one hundred and even three and four hundred years ago. His roots in North America are so much deeper than mine going back to the 1620s in the American Colonies in his Dutch ancestry. How lucky that we did all of that traveling in Europe/British Isles between 2008 and 2016. Life is so different now. Then there was all that traveling in Canada and the United States and even Mexico for one visit. 

I will complete all the powerpoint presentations of our travels. Many of them are now complete but I will finish them all if God grants me that time. The day awaits; off for breakfast. It is 117 years since my father was born at Eastleigh, Hampshire, England today. He lived to be 94 years four months and 22 days old when he died in 1998. When I met my cousins (the children of his first cousin) what struck me the most was how little they looked like him. I would never have known that we shared the same great grandparents just by looking at them. But as we spent time with them I recognized some of the Blake traits that they shared in common with my grandfather (older brother to their grandfather)  and father. There was quite a difference between those brothers with my grandfather being taller than my father but not as tall as his brothers. My grandfather looked like his father but his brothers looked more like their mother whose brothers were tall and heavily built.

 

On to the next phase

The next phase begins as I try to downsize the various collections of things like rocks from particular beaches that we have visited in Canada. That has proven to be particularly easy as they really belong outside. I am still collecting them up and will give them a nice spot in the garden since I am staying here for a longer time either me or a family member at various times.

I also have a collection of fired plates that Edward was very fond of and they number around 30. I am thinking of offering them to one of the groups that has his books for their centre. I need to get that process going as the original boxes still exist and I can package them all up along with the display cases. It would be nice to see them displayed instead of sitting in a drawer as two stacks. We will keep the last display that Edward created of song birds but the rest we will donate for others to enjoy. He would have liked that. I notice that this is one of the items in a website that talks about the items not to purchase with the idea in mind of them increasing in value to pass on to your children. They are just nice pictures on fired plates. They do look very special on the wall for sure. 

I would like to donate Edward's clothes to the Mission but I think they are still not accepting. He has five winter coats all in really good condition plus a number of pairs of winter boots which are also in good condition and especially usable in our climate. Then there are dozens of shirts, pants and other items. In the last few years Ed has given generously to Shepherds of Good Hope and I hope to continue with that since it was one of his thoughts. I give to the Union Mission not a great amount but a regular amount to help there. One item that does make me sad was Edward's new jeans. He bought them when we were shopping one day just before COVID-19 lockdown and he bought a pair. He did wear them a few times but did not get the joy out of them that he might have. I think it is the jeans that most inspire me to give all of these clothes to the Union Mission. They may make a difference in the life of someone struggling to begin their lives in a more meaningful way. 

I keep finding items that I have forgotten through the years. A chess set that his mother brought back from Mexico as a gift to him. He actually does not play chess and even with the new set I could not persuade him to play but he did enjoy the chess set and it sat on a table in the living room for a few years. 

What to do with sleeping bags and camping equipment? My days of camping are definitely in the past but we did buy new sleeping bags to keep in the car in case we were ever stranded somewhere in the winter. Perhaps I will find a new home for them. They are washable; one of the great things about modern life is the washability of so many things. 

The day beckons although it looks like rain.

What would God have us do

We need to be the caretakers of the earth not the destroyers. I have been a recycler for a very long time as we collected up our tin cans way back when we first got a car about a year after we married. We took them to the dump ourselves in those day. We must protect the earth; it is our existence. We come from the earth and we return to the earth. The earth is our Mother. 

It is a question that I often ask God - what would he have us do. He does not answer me because the answer is obvious. We need to do our best always. We need to follow the ten commandments and we need to follow the teachings of Jesus - feed the hungry, care for the sick and clothe the needy. Our place in the earth is given to us and we need to protect it in as much as we are capable of doing. 

Yesterday was a downsizing day and there are boxes of linens to go to Salvation Army. We are trying to avoid putting everything into landfill so try not to put out in the garbage things that can be reused. Organizations need to exist that take the items that can be recycled; there is likely money in it in the future but the industry of recycling needs to be created and we have come a long way since I was a child. 

Hopefully rain today at some point as the ground is very very dry. Our tomatoes are doing very well and we continue to take off about two quarts of cherry tomatoes every second day. The peppers got dried out when I was away but are slowly coming back. The lettuce is finished. The onions are all pulled. It was a small garden this year. 

Today I clean the main floor but with all the downsizing I did not get all my dusting done on the top floor so will try to complete that today as well. 

Off to breakfast; love my breakfast of oatmeal, cranberries, and raising cooked for five minutes and then add wheat germ, wheat bran and blueberries. A hearty breakfast to start another busy day. Looking for a slow day to just work away on my stacks of paper work. I need to be ready for income tax time next February. I am literally afraid to throw any paper work out in case I need it. I have done the taxes for many years but this year will be a challenge I think. Time will tell. 

Afghanistan

I am mostly sad for the families of the Canadian soldiers and the coalition forces who were killed in Afghanistan  and for the many soldiers who are now maimed because of land mines. But I am also sad for the people of Afghanistan.

Today there is comment that the Taliban will permit women to be part of their government. Is it a wait and see moment? There has just been so much war the last twenty years in Afghanistan and for generations before that. Now an entire generation of children has grown up though in a country where education was available for all desiring it except when the Taliban killed the children and destroyed schools and as always children are the future. One prays that Civil War does not now become the life in Afghanistan. The children deserve peace. 

As a Canadian my interest is in peace for a people that have faced war for the last twenty years and for years before that but that peace must be fair and equal for all in Afghanistan. The Taliban have shown us what they can do can they now make a peace that works for all of the people of Afghanistan?  

They must see that Afghanistan can have a good life given the progress of the last twenty years. What do they want for their people or are they just selfish wanting to continue a ruthless existence that doesn't end up benefiting anyone except for the greedy? 

There is always a price to pay if you support an attack on another country? Human nature demands a response unfortunately. Hating the lifestyle of Western nations does not give one the right to attack them. 

I am surprised at how much my political opinion has changed in this past decade. A staunch Conservative all of my life I actually have been voting Liberal. I hate the way they throw money at everything without a really good plan that is economically sound but they have managed this past year to come up with really good ideas on how to support a country closed down by a pandemic. I really liked the plan to have the WE charity manage support for students last summer and it was perhaps the last straw for me when the Conservatives basically threw a wrench into all of that and destroyed the plan purely for political purposes. Children deserve better; they have suffered a great deal during this pandemic; their schooling interrupted and their social progress put on hold basically. 

Do we need an election? It pumps money into the economy so why not. Anything that gets the economy moving again is a good thing. The Conservatives need to come up with better ideas not just bashing Justin Trudeau. I never voted for his father but have voted for the son because he represents the Liberal party which has managed to pull off this past year and a half in an amazingly good way in spite of their habit of just throwing money at it. This is one time that we need to just continue to pump money into the economy to bring it back. At the moment I can only think of things that I do not like about the Conservative party; it would be nice to see a return to Progressive Conservative not Regressive. I do not want to hear of any talk about rolling back our forward momentum in greening the economy; I support the oil industry because plastics is the future not because we need gas guzzling cars. But we need to manage those plastics; to use their durability rather than their expedience. I never want any discussion on abortion; it is a personal issue and doesn't belong in politics or the criminal code. Young girls died from botched abortions; never again should that happen and that is my opinion since I worked in the hospital when I was 19 years of age and now nearly 76 years of age. Before I worked there I did not believe in abortion but then I was never in the position of needing one so again it is a personal decision. 

And please do not turn vaccination into a political attitude. The need to be vaccinated is paramount; I like being a hermit living mostly in my own space and time and also living with my family. But I got vaccinated because it is the right thing to do as a member of the human race. When I was a child we were vaccinated against smallpox because it was the right thing to do. Killer diseases can only be eradicated by vaccination not by burying your head in the sand (that can kill you just as COVID-19 can kill you). Perhaps the most important thing to do right now is to vaccinate the world and hopefully that will continue at a rapid pace. It would be nice to see stats on that actually and they are available. 31.7%  (as of four hours ago) of the world population has received at least one dose and 23.7% are fully vaccinated. Coronavirus (COVID-19) Vaccinations - Statistics and Research - Our World in Data. We still have a long way to go. 37.05 million doses are administered each day at this time.

Monday and the cleaning week begins once again

Today is the top floor cleaning. The routine is working very well for me. I do not spend several hours cleaning anymore but rather it is setting up the I-Robot and letting it do the work and then going in and dusting when it is finished. Gradually the rooms have less in them and are easier to clean. 

My purpose has become clearer to me that I need to get back into doing my one name studies now that my newsletters are all caught up. Is it genealogy? Not really I do put trees together on occasion but mostly I am looking at the deep ancestry of the Blake and Pincombe families so more of an historical survey than genealogy. Genealogy never did interest me from a purely family tree aspect; my younger sister working with her mother in law has done a marvelous job on the family tree for her husband and herself. 

I also think analyzing the H11 Haplogroup has become quite fascinating and being a smaller part of H has served me well in that it is localized back into the earlier centuries. These days it is all over the world. That is my other focus of attention and has been for over ten years now. 

Of course the third arm of my research will be to get Edward's research published on his blog. I have not really looked at that yet. I am somewhat daunted by the 28 research boxes plus archival boxes (six). Now that that isn't 60 boxes though I have more of a feeling that I can get through all of this material. Giving away parts of his research to people who are working on particular names has worked very well (four boxes). Plus there were 16 boxes that were runs of journals. Four  of the boxes had material from the Ottawa Ham Radio Club, the Royal Astronomical Society, Ottawa Field Naturalist and a couple of other groups of which he was a member or we were members jointly. I may still be able to give away the Allen material I need to contact his cousins to see if they would like to have all of it. There may be four or five boxes of Allen. Then there is the Kipp material and that is original pictures of the pioneers who went west to British Columbia, Alberta and Saskatchewan. I have contacted Library and Archives Canada and now I need to fill in their sheets. I think that may be two or three boxes.  Some of the boxes were not full so we were able to combine a few of them.

I have a few more pieces of furniture than I planned on retaining but time may let me downsize them as well. I would like the house to be fairly sparse as it is easier to maintain. Finally got play sand and setting sand to fill the spaces between the bricks of the patio and laneway. That will be a chore to complete in August. Already I can feel the thought of getting ready for winter and welcome it enthusiastically. The spare time will be wonderful.

Another beautiful Sunday

The windows are open today letting in the fresh breezes cool and fresh in the morning. It is just 14 degrees. We have waited all week for a cooling trend although it may not last I do not think we will have such heat as this past week. I still enjoy that hot weather; my arthritis enjoys the heat for sure. The winters are long and cold here although I love that period as well when we are just inside with oodles of working time. 

Off to Church at 10:30 via YouTube. This morning I awoke feeling that Ed's presence is still here even though we have changed so much now but his research room looks very like his study when the girls were younger except for the hope chest in the corner where the desk was in those days.  The three large chests were not here at that time but rather that wall was lined with towering bookcases filled to the brim. When Ed started to volunteer with the Friends of Library and Archives Canada back in 2004 the bookcases were all over the house where ever there was a spot that could hold a bookcase. In the basement it was wall to wall bookcases which created a family room with the television there. The television was always in the basement here until the fall before the pandemic when we carried it upstairs and redid the living room. It was one of the changes which he most enjoyed and his new centre became the living room where he enjoyed so many programs on the television although he was still very active in the Fall of 2019 with all sorts of travel plans. 

Between 2004 and 2016 when Edward stopped volunteering with FLAC, he transported many many bags of books to donate for the sales. I do not know how many books we actually had as I had only catalogued about half of them into LibraryThing when he started to reduce the number. I would estimate over 10,000 though but they were coming in still as well as going out so no real idea on that actual number. We had nearly 2000 VHS tapes and about 500 DVDs and these have been reduced to just three book boxes now. We liked documentaries mostly and had purchased quite a few biblical tapes and DVDs through the years which I have retained. The bulk of them went to one of my older brothers who enjoyed them and passed them on to book sales when he was finished with them. 

Time does march onward and we must keep up with that beat or fall behind which has been the case for our species from the beginning of our time. We have been watching documentaries on Netflix in the evening the past few months. Just one show as I tend to just watch the news and weather on the television a few times a day. I do like Netflix though for its sets of documentaries. This one is about Islands and the flora and fauna which dwells there. They have been most interesting and last night was the Galapagos which Ed decided he would like to visit when the pandemic was over. It was a fascinating documentary and the visit would certainly have been most interesting. The planned trip to Germany was very much on his mind as well and we continued improving our German in preparation for that up until early in this year. We both studied scientific German in our university days so had a smattering of the language making it somewhat easier to learn everyday conversation. 

On to the day and enjoying all of that fresh air.

Ancestry matches

I finally got all of my ancestry accounts up to date with DNA matches. A couple of new and interesting ones that continue to point to my Buller line and likely the X chromosome. I do not know these people at all but do know their ancestry from their trees. There is one portion of the X chromosome that has come directly to all of us from Sarah (Cheatle) Welch who was my 3x great grandmother. Her daughter Ann (Welch) Buller) married Henry Christopher Buller and they had eleven children Ann's X chromosome was passed to my maternal grandmother intact from her father hence the strong matches on the X chromosome. Interesting that such a good length passed from a 3x great grandmother to us. But only some of us of my seven siblings only five have tested and only three have inherited this rather interesting length which varies between 18 cM and 28 cM with most around 25 cM. Occasionally one of the Ancestry customers posts their DNA to Gedmatch but I also have matches at 23 and Me  and FT DNA just to give me a rather well rounded look at the DNA and its ancestry back to Sarah Cheatle. Sarah's mother is also named Sarah and may be Sarah Bonnell who married a William Cheatle 7 Jan 1752 at All Saints Loughborough, Leicestershire.

Taking a break was a good idea

Taking a break away from home for two weeks was a good idea. I came back ready to tackle the rearranging and eventual return to research. Four months have passed and they have been the longest months of my life perhaps but looking back the time passed very quickly with all the projects that Edward left for us to complete for him. It wasn't that he set down a list but rather they were items that he mentioned whilst we were talking and watching his favourite TV programs. The TV has hardly been on since. It surprised me that I did not know that he had such a fondness for TV shows. We were just always too busy in our nearly 55 years together and especially in the past twenty years planning trips and doing research once our children were either in their careers or preparing for them. 

I started noticing that some people that we knew had passed away these past twenty years perhaps about two years ago. We do not move in a circuit of people our own age and so illness and death of people we knew did not become known to us. We just went on one trip and then planned the next and in between spent time with our family. We gardened (Ed enthusiastically and me just to help him out) and perhaps one day I will find enthusiasm for gardening I certainly like looking at the product of gardening! We walked and we biked until the last few years. Our activity level was huge really and that, in retrospect, is probably what kept Edward healthy in spite of the illness which was steadily eroding him in those early days. The first knell of alarm for me was the ultrasound technician in the fall of 2016 telling Edward that his scan was quite serious and needed immediate medical care (really she should not have told him but on the other hand the family doctor was equally alarmed). He was into the family doctor the next week and so our struggle to control this chronic condition began. That he even went for the ultrasound was the result of a quick thinking respirologist who did some tests outside of the norm for his field that pointed out a problem and this was mid 2016 and now it is mid 2021 and Edward's battle is finished but he still managed to do a lot in those five years in terms of putting material together and downsizing his enormous collection of information. I will always wonder if he could have survived longer if the COVID-19 pandemic had not taken the activity out of his life in the winter - he loved to walk and shop in the malls and stores and we did that several times a day. Walking around the house, biking on a stationary bike and using the treadmill were just not enough continuous exercise as he simply did not enjoy the house walking, biking or treadmill particularly. We miss him and always will but he is at peace now in God's arms. 

There is still so much to do - Sympathy cards to be thanked, switching over accounts and planning where we will be buried. My daughters said do not worry about that we will come up with a solution one of these days and so I return to my quiet life and let my children manage. Really management of death is for the living. But I shall continue to organize so that there is little to do when God calls me home.

Research Room preparation continues

We continued putting together the Research Room yesterday. The only extra items in the room are the Hope Chest that belonged to Edward's mother which is going to her oldest grandchild and the Family Bibles of the Kipp and Schultz families (Edward's paternal grandparent's lines). A cousin of Edwards is interested in those Bibles. We will also put together all of the dishes of Edward's mother for her oldest grand daughter. That will remain with us until we can get all of these items to southwestern Ontario. Edward's desk is now in front of the window and we will put his urn and the flowers (orchids) which my daughter has managed to get to produce enormous blooms this past month on top of the desk but otherwise we will restore the desk to the way that it looked when Edward was using it. His computer is on the computer desk also in the room and where he had it when he used this room as his study. We moved all of the picture albums to the wooden bookcases which he stained and varnished. Gradually we will go through those albums and keep just the pictures that are family pictures since there are about 40 picture albums between 1965 and 2001. The rest of the images are digital from 2001 to the present. 

The closet will hold 12 research boxes which is rather lucky as I thought it might just be 9 banker boxes. The remaining 11 boxes will need to be placed somehow but will work on the logistics of that later. Since we have decided not to move for at least another three years we are putting the books that we have kept back on the bookcases that we also kept. The children's books will all go in the living room. It will be a little different than we thought since we are going to stay. I need to come up with a plan for the backyard as I can not maintain that in other than grass for the most part. The trees growing up around us are so large and grew so quickly but are helping with that for sure as grass is all that will grow for the most part these days. 

The yard is huge and would lend itself to a nice pool and patio with sun in the morning behind the house and shade in the afternoon perhaps the best case scenario for any backyard! There would still be plenty of room for a pleasant patio area at the back under the maple tree and the hedge is gradually filling in after the accident about seven years ago that destroyed the fence further down from us but also did take out about one quarter of our back fence which was repaired by the city.  But that is for someone else to do not me! Being right on the light rail route (just a ten minute walk) to downtown is also advantageous. Plus it has four bedrooms and you could put in a sliding glass door at the back which would lead out to a patio and pool. You could even extend this house if you wanted as the depth of the yard from the back of the house to the back fence is just over 180 feet. 

The Research Room looks down on the backyard and it is quite quiet even given the presence of a four lane road behind us. The hedge and tree block all of that traffic noise and the street is quiet in the day and night just work time coming and going keep it busy. 

More work today vacuuming and putting books on the shelves and vacuuming research boxes into the research room. I also want to find out how many dishes there actually are that belonged to Edward's mother. Edward rearranged the kitchen when he retired (and I was still working) and there are piles of unused dishes at the back of most of the kitchen cupboards plus a large white glassed in cupboard contains a number of them. I would like to eliminate that cupboard and this may make it possible. 

On to another day of reorganization.

Advances in Braille

 One of the skills I learned as a child was reading braille. Next door to my grandmother when I was about eight years old was living a student in ophthalmology who told my grandmother that I would be blind by the time I was 20 years of age. The impact on me was to learn Braille. As it turned out I was not blind at 20 years of age but I do wear fairly strong glasses. My eyes are surprisingly strong as I have read thousands of documents now in middle English as I kept busy the last 12 years doing paleography when spare time appeared. These have been very busy years since I retired early in 2008 officially although I actually finished working in mid 2007 when my shoulder injury made it necessary for me to do a lot of physio. 

I see my transcriptions as part of my service to God by making available the Church Records which I have transcribed through the years. Doing Service at Church is no longer within my ability and has not been for many many years. 

Just noticing that some of the leaves on the maple tree have started to turn or they are just not getting enough water perhaps. The Black walnut does block out much of the sky these days. Possibly in five years it will pretty much cover our yard.

Progress on the Research Room

We managed to do quite a bit on the structural part of the Research Room. Just have a couple more pieces of furniture to move in; the computer, the scanner and then we can start organizing the boxes into the room. I think another couple of weeks and I might even be able to start to work on the research boxes. 

It is a slow process to rework your life that for 54.5 years was a twosome working together and raising two children. Ten years ago I spent half of my time assisting Edward with his research organization but his one year illness that eventually resulted in the pacemaker being inserted created a change in our lives in that he rested more and I had more time to devote to my one-name studies plus my interest in DNA was very much taking over my projects and redirecting them away from accumulation of family tree type information. My younger sister had started into genealogy around 2007 and rapidly outstripped the growth of my tree which still remains at a rather low number compared to her tree which is about five times as large or more; haven't looked for a little while. 

The garden has suffered the most this year as I just have not had the time to really work at it. Next year it will be smaller and perhaps I will have someone come in and spread fresh earth and grass seed. It does really need that once again. Our neighbours have a more relaxed attitude towards grass and we are starting to acquire more wild plants in the lawn than was there when both Edward and I would be out there digging out dandelions, stinging nettle, bladderwort, daisies, etc etc. I discovered during one of the wind storms that some quite large branches came down from the maple tree last week and so we spent a couple of hours breaking all of that up to go with the garbage pickup on Saturday. It never ends really looking after a garden until winter. Another reason to love winter for sure! 

I now have the luxury of time which has not been the case these many years. In my mid teens I became interested in my parent's surnames. My grandfather Blake had lived with us and did tell me that there must be a number of Blake lines because his line was in England, he believed, before the Norman Conquest. DNA has certainly proven that to be an accurate statement about his Blake line at or near to Andover Hampshire England. Perhaps it was the First Nations peoples mentioning that they had always lived in a particular area that rekindled that thought in my mind in 2011. When you are very ancient to a line then thousands of years pass one would feel that you had always been in that place which was my grandfather's interpretation of his Blake family. Finding them in that place in the records back into the early 1300s was an eye opener for me. I remember going to the history section of the library in my mid teens (I did tend to haunt libraries in my youth) and finding write ups on the Blake surname and they did not match what he had said with regard to the Norman Conquest and his Blake line. I actually do not find any Blake names associated with the Norman Conquest as I have mentioned in my blog the le Blak name did come from Rouen Normandy but not until the 1270s and this Richard le Blak came as a merchant wanting to set up a wool market in England. Pincombe was not known to me in terms of deep ancestry other than what my mother remembered her father saying and interestingly enough her father had died when she was eight (my Blake grandfather died when I was eight) so that I did believe what my mother remembered about her Pincombe line. She did have a good memory for the facts as it turned out I was able to readily trace our Pincombe line back to the 1480s at North Molton, Devon. I have hypothesized that this family came from Pencombe Hertfordshire with Lord de la Zouch after the Battle of Bosworth Field where, it would appear they supported Richard III, given that Lord de la Zouch was attainted following the Battle by Henry VII the victor. So I continue with those one-name studies which I took on in 2007 for Pincombe and in 2011 for Blake. Genealogy itself does not interest me that much other than it is a tool for looking backwards in family lines but the tracing of cousins is not high on my agenda unless I am working with DNA and wanting to prove a particular line in a particular place and then I do get into genealogy although tend to have a look at my sister's tree first!